IF ASIAN WOMEN ARE WORLD-FAMOUS FOR HAVING "WHITE FEVER" AND HATING ASIAN MEN, WHAT HAPPENS WHEN THEY HAVE A SON WHO LOOKS ASIAN? WHAT HAPPENS WHEN ASIAN WOMEN SAY "NO ASIAN MEN," AND HALF ASIAN SONS HEAR THE SAME? I HAPPEN. THIS IS THE BLOG OF A DARTMOUTH EDUCATED EURASIAN SON OF A RACIST, NAZI-SYMPATHIZING, HOLOCAUST DENYING, HOMOPHOBIC CONSERVATIVE, UNDEREMPLOYED, CONSPIRACY THEORIST WHITE MAN AND A HONG KONG WOMAN WHO HAD "WHITE FEVER," DOCUMENTING THE IMMENSE DAMAGE AND ABUSE DONE OVER 20 YEARS OF LIVING UNDER ONE OF THE MOST HATEFUL, RACIST PAIRINGS ON EARTH. FORMER NEO-NAZI, FORMER EXTREME RACIST, AND YES, HALF ASIAN.
AMWF: Handsome, full head of hair, mentally stable + a nice woman who loves him for who he is, and is sexually attracted to him, and wants her kids to look Asian like him.
WMAF: Unattractive, racist, bottom of the barrel, hypocritical anti-feminist who marries a cruel, asexual, mentally ill, hostile, negative, self hating Tiger Mom who wants her kids to look white, and marries for social status, money, and bragging rights that her child isn’t Asian (even though the child is Asian), while talking shit about Asian men and white women alongside her loser, insecure husband.
Only a matter of time before a WMAF couple kills an AMWF couple.
A WMAF offspring kills an AMWF couple. (Oh wait, that already happened in Elliot Rodger)
I am a formerly well liked, handsome, outgoing, popular, Dartmouth educated Eurasian man – a literal brown haired, hazel eyed dream Hapa boy – born to a mentally ill, violent, Chinese mother who sought out marriage into the powered WASP class – but then realized too late that the man she married was an underemployed, emotionally damaged, meek, rapidly balding, hyper-racist, hyper-conservative conspiracy theorist male who was an “Asiaphile” who wanted a “traditional, chaste Asian wife who wouldn’t sleep with black men” – and she essentially killed herself. At around age 20 I encountered anti-Asian racism (ironically from Asian women in my own family and white “friends” who actually liked Asian women because they were easy) and due to inheriting my father’s entitlement to the world and being raised to be superior, I was unprepared to deal with it; I am emotionally unstable, self-loathing, deeply mentally disturbed, addicted, underemployed, have strong intimacy issues, and to this day still unable to undo the damage that the Eurasian myths and family’s racism did to me, and unable to form proper relationships due to my self-hatred instilled on me during the first 20 years of my life. Unlike other Eurasians who find self-esteem in underpaid modeling jobs, are gay, permavirgins, or leverage their half-whiteness to Asian women, my self-implosion has been broadcast to the world to the point that I am internet famous. I am not afraid to be as viciously honest as I need to be in order to speak on the reality of this world.
If you don’t think this website is valid – go to Reddit.com/r/hapas, which received 13.5 million views in 2 years, and 2 million views in the last two months. Also – find half Asians with Asian fathers and compare their behavior to those with Asian mothers.
There are very specific issues with being the children of anti-feminist, racist, unattractive white men, and self hating Asian women who try as hard as they can to integrate and create white children, due to their hatred at their marginalization, and their hatred of their undefined facial features.
There are very specific issues pertinent to the “je ne sais quoi” of white men and Asian women, and the incredibly weird, unbalanced, uncomfortable, fetishized “dynamic” of “superior White man,” and “dainty, beautiful Asian woman.”
None of these apply to the children of Asian fathers. Almost every single part-Asian that people use to justify the superiority of Half Asians involves a Half Asian with an Asian father or grandfather (or both): Keanu Reeves, Dean Cain, Brandon Lee, and his father Bruce Lee. The reason why the sons and daughters of Asian men and white women fare better is simply because they are raised to not view whiteness as a superior entity; which both of my parents did, both of them being white supremacists.
Asian women specifically hate Asian men – and hope to create Eurasian children in order to raise their status; White men use Asian women as a means to get laid, provided that they are unable to do so with non-Asian women, whereby meaning that Eurasian childrens’ only value is to look as un-Asian as possible, meaning that Eurasian children are highly prone to mental illness, extremely racist parents, and broken homes. Failing to look attractive (our primary stereotype), means that many Half Asians just look Asian – which are essentially the bottom of the barrel in the racial hierarchy in the West. This also doesn’t take into account the extreme, cruel, controlling, demeaning, calculating nature of Asian women, where they explicitly hope their children look White, so that Asian women can feel “superior” in wresting the White woman’s status and power away from her at the side of the White man.
Asian women are the ONLY race that explicitly goes out of their way to attack men of Asian appearance in an attempt to integrate and raise their own value. I do NOT like Asian women, firstly because they are physically unattractive (the fact that they look constantly angry, and the fact that they seem to have no life to their appearance, and just look like they’re always scheming), and also because their behavior is off-putting, controlling, hateful, calculating, and rude, as many others have noticed about them; they seem to pick lower status, unattractive white, and only white men, while Asian and Eurasian men will marry anyone, while Asian women only marry white males. Asian women will actually go out of their way to attack Eurasian men, as well, in a desperate attempt to bring Asian looking men down with them, and lower status, unattractive white men will use this as a ways to validate their whiteness – at the expense of anyone of Asian appearance, including Half Asian men. Asian women will attempt to control their Asian looking sons’ dating choices – pushing them towards Asian women; while white men who marry Asian women will act upon their insecurity and lack of control of their marriage, and lash out at Asian men, black men, and white women. Asian women are so unattractive that they pursue bottom of the barrel men of all races, men who are unable to get White women (their first choices), putting Half Asian children in danger. They will also go out of their way to ensure their flimsy “status,” my assaulting or attacking non-Asian women who are sympathetic to or even date Asian men, out of fear that the equal status of Asian men will reveal that Asian women are in fact not as good as they think they are.
Even Kip Fulbeck, king of all Hapas, admitted that the Hapa male process of self-hatred is such a problem, that it should be a cause for concern.
Imagine being raised by two racists – your own parents. Your own mother wanted a white man, yet here you are – a half Asian, a man who looks very Asian. Except you have a white father. Is it possible to raise a healthy child considering the loaded, white-worshipping nature of yellow fever and white fever? How can a biracial child be expected to be normal if he looks Asian, and the entire basis of his parents’ relationship was that the man not be Asian? How can Asian women outmarry at such high rates, have an open ‘white fetish,’ and expect Asian looking sons to be emotionally well adjusted?
In short: I am the son of a foreign born Asian woman from Hong Kong who deliberately married a tall (6’3″, skinny), red-haired, blue eyed, bearded white man. She, like many Asian women, sought out a man who had a “Western” background so that she could feel integrated into her new home, and better than her fully Asian peers. She was by and large mentally ill, violent, abusive, cruel towards my father when he wasn’t making enough money, extremely controlling, and had self-image issues, changing her entire appearance to “look white.” She did not and never did love my father, and only used him because he was white; their entire marriage was violent, loveless (father sleeping on the floor for fifteen years), and calculating.
This man (a semi-famous paleoconservative Homophobic activist on par with the Westboro Baptist Church) was interested in Asian culture and married because he was socially unable to marry a white or non-Asian woman due to his political beliefs and personality quirks (he is very socially conservative, very racist against blacks, Hispanics and Muslims, a Holocaust denier and anti-Semite, extremely over the top homophobic, very shy, not many friends, belief that white women are too liberated, extremely distasteful of feminism, extremely meek and unable to make eye contact with others, steps off the sidewalk when larger men approach, unwilling to work or make money for fear of violating Christian scripture). His interest in Asian culture was largely dictated by his personality – in which he idealized Asian cultures as being more honorable and traditional, and mistook “white worship” (a cultural tick in which Asian women see themselves as less beautiful than white women and marry white men for status and integration), for “traditionalism” and “submissiveness.”
I was raised largely as a white child, yet turned more Asian in appearance with age. I was raised in an environment that had an undercurrent of anti-Asian male racism (America), saw Asian women (including five out of six of them in my own family, all of them, including my own parents divorced or separated – my mother being dead) throw themselves at white men (the majority of whom are racists, Republicans, or short and or meek), and also an over-current of false Eurasian myths about beauty and intelligence. I subconsciously always believed myself to be “less” because my own mother and her sisters all were married to white men and adamantly denied I was Asian for a decade.
My parents’ relationship, as was the case in every single one of my female relatives, was loveless, violent and broken due to her disillusionment with my father after ten years as he failed to make enough money, and grew balder and fatter and no longer lived up to the White male Prince Charming she had wanted (separate bedrooms, forced to sleep on the couch, extreme violent fighting). My brother and I suffered extreme psychological and physical abuse (beaten with coat hangers by our mother, Tiger Mommed, had her threaten to kill herself with a butcher knife in front of us, threatened to crash the car with us in it while driving at 90 mph), and her behavior became worse and worse as she realized that her white husband wasn’t making as much money as her brother and sister, who both married Chinese partners. This is a story of someone who was very sick, and in recovery.
The behavior of Asian women, in particular, is like nothing else on earth, to the point that you can see the majority of all stories about abusive parents on Reddit’s AsianParentStories sub – complain about the mothers, including the second generation Asian mothers – like Amy Chua – who metamorphosize into the Tiger Mothers that they hate, despite claiming to hate Asian men. Celeste Ng, a New York Times best-selling author, personally attacked me, after I pointed out that her book “Everything I Never Told You” was based on the broken WMAF families in her friends’ circle, yet she had written it about a family involving an Asian father. Asian women have proven themselves to be extremely hostile against non-Asian women, something out of their deep self-loathing and cultural proclivity towards integration and status, wherein love is secondary if not nonexistent in favor of maintaining status, face, and power over women who they view, deep down, as more beautiful than them. They will even go so far as to attack Asian male / non-Asian female couples, and force their Eurasian children (like me) to marry Asian, in an attempt to maintain an image of false superiority over non-Asian women; (e.g., that Asian women are the most beautiful, when they are not, and heavily rely on yellow fever and male desperation for their feeling of integration and desirability).
When I got older, despite the fact that society told me that I was “unique” for being Eurasian, I was treated with contempt by both white people AND Asian people; Asian women would often express disgust at me for being Asian (scowling at me on the street, or smirking), and white people would constantly remind me that I was Asian in a way to demean and undermine me. Several of my “friends,” who were engineers and nerdy, actually would take every opportunity to remind me of my Asianness, while sleeping with Asian women, as Asian women were all they could get. This caused me to self implode from a popular, outgoing Eurasian to becoming a recluse and suicidal. My insanity grew more and more pervasive as I fantasized about cutting out my eyes to make them deeper, refused to look in the mirror for five years,
Two years after writing the below, I am leaving it word for word, as I wrote it, as proof of how I felt and feelings I still struggle with as a male of Asian heritage who clearly looks Asian, born to a mother who thought of Asian men as beneath her. I am highly educated, formerly well liked, popular, handsome, out going and like many Eurasians I burned out in my twenties with the realization that people, even Asian women in my Asian family,hate my Asian side,so now I’ve turned my talents towards exposing the last bastion of White supremacy in the world as candidly as I can. I am literally dissectingWhite male / Asian women couples and the Eurasian identity to a degree that nobody else ever has.
I actually moved to China (which saved my life) in order to escape racism and feelings of inferiority – and was shocked on learning that my own mother (and many other Chinese) had moved to America in order to find the American dream – a dream that hated me for my Asian blood.
I highly recommend that any potential parent to half-Asian children make sure that they are marrying on a clean slate – with zero fetishism, zero white-worship, and zero undertones of racial hierarchies – and that they be completely honest about this, to avoid sending more young man down the path that I went. Hapa males in particular need special consideration due to the fact that we have zero privilege, and yet are raised by two people who want privilege without having to do any of the work.
I am doing this for every single half-Asian kid out there who has committed suicide, thought about suicide, suffered from racism, isolation, outcasting, and had two parents whose entire relationship was nothing but lust, selfishness, even hatred – leaving us with nothing but perpetual isolation. The world does not care about Hapa males if you look average or even a little bit Asian. The world – even Asian women, who truly believe that they are white – only care about whiteness and white men.
I’ve mentioned this several times on my blog. If you don’t believe me, my dad has adamantly denied the Holocaust, has made comments about Jews being the anti-Christ incarnate, loved HAM radio and conspiracy theory radio shows, etc. He also has virtually no friends, etc.
Doing research today it turned out that Bobby Fischer, probably the most famous chess champion of all time, was also married to a Philipino woman and to a Japanese woman.
Is this coincidental? Is it coincidental that the majority of the time when you find a white man with a “passion” for Asian woman, he generally has conservative viewpoints, i.e., hates Islam, the Islamic takeover of Europe, hates western women, hates feminism, blacks, “mudsharks” (i.e., women who sleep with black men), and overall tends towards the right (as broad as the term is)?
Obviously not all white men involved with Asian women are like that, but this is a nice little tidbit that I think can help explain the imbalance.
From Fischer’s Wikipedia biography:
Fischer made numerous anti-Jewish statements and professed a general hatred for Jews since at least the early 1960s. Jan Hein Donner wrote that at the time of Bled 1961, “He idolized Hitler and read everything about him that he could lay his hands on. He also championed a brand of anti-semitism that could only be thought up by a mind completely cut off from reality”. Donner took Fischer to a war museum, which “left a great impression, since [Fischer] is not an evil person, and afterwards he was more restrained in his remarks—to me, at least.”
Although Fischer described his mother as Jewish in a 1962 interview, he later denied his Jewish ancestry. In 1984, Fischer denied being a Jew in a letter to the Encyclopaedia Judaica, insisting that they remove his name and accusing them of “fraudulently misrepresenting me to be a Jew […] to promote your religion”.
From the 1980s on, Fischer’s comments about Jews were a major theme in his public and private remarks. He openly denied the Holocaust, and called the United States “a farce controlled by dirty, hook-nosed, circumcised Jew bastards”.  Between 1999 and 2006, Fischer’s primary means of communicating with the public was radio interviews. He participated in at least 34 such broadcasts, mostly with radio stations in the Philippines, but also in Hungary, Iceland, Colombia, and Russia. In 1999, he gave a radio call-in interview to a station in Budapest, Hungary, during which he described himself as the “victim of an international Jewish conspiracy”. In another radio interview, Fischer said that it became clear to him in 1977, after reading The Secret World Government by Count Cherep-Spiridovich, that Jewish agencies were targeting him. Fischer’s sudden reemergence was apparently triggered when some of his belongings, which had been stored in a Pasadena, California storage unit, were sold by the landlord who claimed it was in response to nonpayment of rent.
Fischer’s library contained anti-semitic and racist literature such as Mein Kampf, The Protocols of the Elders of Zion, and The White Man’s Bible and Nature’s Eternal Religion by Ben Klassen, founder of the World Church of the Creator.A notebook written by Fischer contains sentiments such as “8/24/99 Death to the Jews. Just kill the Motherfuckers!” and “12/13/99 It’s time to start randomly killing Jews”. Despite his views, Fischer remained on good terms with Jewish chess players.
A notebook written by Fischer contains sentiments such as “8/24/99 Death to the Jews. Just kill the Motherfuckers!” and “12/13/99 It’s time to start randomly killing Jews”
I’m back. This website is far too valuable to just give up.
I predict that in the future Asian women are desperately going to try to suppress any and all websites that pertain to half Asian issues…. despite mine existing as one of the most visible and me being proven to be the son of an Asian woman and a white man.
The methods they will use are this:
“I dated an Asian man once.”
“Asian women don’t belong to anyone.”
“We just fell in love.”
“We never saw race.”
How many times will this scenario happen?
An Asian woman will go through life chasing white men, a white lifestyle, badmouthing Asian men, and then once her children are born, and are in her arms, will say “I will kill anyone who says such horrible things to my son.”
To be born from an Asian woman who had a white fetish is the greatest humiliation on earth. While her life was easy, being easily integrated into Western society, as the sidepiece for white men, easily ducking overt racism and easily finding love, her son will face discrimination at every turn, be treated as a sexual non-entity, and be overcome with the overt racism that his own mother and father practiced within the home.
I say this with utmost, utmost sincerity: if you cannot see the irony of raising a child of color under the principal that his father must be, and only be white – and under the belief that white men, indeed are superior to Asian men: Abort your son. I’m begging you.
I’ve shown my face and been proven to be Eurasian. I am tall, good looking, educated, and I still would not wish the utter horror of being born Eurasian on anyone. This monumental burden of carrying the fact that your entire life was predicated on the very inability of Asian men to be seen as human beings. And I could go out, and pretend to be happy, to use my white privilege to my example, but I don’t, and I recognize my mother exactly for what she is:
A woman who betrayed herself in order to ingratiate herself to the West; and then had the AUDACITY to tell me to be proud to be Chinese, to be one of millions of Eurasians born exclusively to white fathers, in the hopes that we would become some kind of “master race.”
How is a master race of Eurasians, some more Asian looking than others, ever supposed to amount to anything when our own birth represented the victory of whiteness over Asianness? We expect to turn our backs on our Asian side and say, “yes, of course our fathers were white,” and live happy lives as a result? We’re supposed to just play second fiddle to white men, the perpetual reminder of how being Asian is a curse that will expel one from society? To endure racism, as an Asian man, knowing very well that our very own mothers contributed to it?
And so many people will say, oh, EurasianWriter must be a bitter full Asian man. No one could ever possibly believe this. But how could I not? The title of this website is “longing for death.” Originally it was planned as suicide so that I could demonstrate the real damage that Asian women were doing to their own sons… but now it remains as a perpetual thorn in their side.
When you have a son, your privilege as a blue-eyed white male is thrown out the door.
Whereas, if your partner were constantly complimenting your blue eyes, your son will not be able to leverage his blue eyes in order to secure a mate. He will instead have to rely on different factors, and since the number of women, including Asian women, who openly favor Asian men, is much lower, this will be damaging to his emotional well-being. For every Asian woman who deliberately rejected Asian men, so forth will your Eurasian son be rejected. My clash with my monumental ego and narcissism, years back, where I was literally obsessed with my looks, sent me into a rage when I was rejected by a white woman for being Asian (I’ve mentioned this many times before).
On “beautiful Hapa babies.”
This is by and large a lie. All babies are universally cute, but this does not translate to being an attractive male. A desire for a beautiful baby is essentially on par with having a pet; hence you see many divorced Asian women (divorced largely because of their insane behavior, like my mother’s, wherein the child is part of a fantasy) using their children as status symbols. My mother constantly showed me off to her siblings and mentioned my tall nose and deep eyes whereas ostracizing my father, but again, this does not translate to necessary success in the future; it is borderline narcissism wherein the love for the child is not love per se, but love as long as [qualifications] exist.
If you do a youtube search for “half asian babies” you will find a number bragging about how their children have blue eyes; despite this being impossible, the idea that such white worship is prevalent is extremely, extremely troublesome.
My case was unusual. My mother seemed to like my brother more than me despite him being black haired, black eyed. She Tiger Mommed him more than me, but less cruelly; I began to think that it was because I was either born via C-section or because I didn’t look like her, or even some kind of resentment towards me. My memory doesn’t go back that far so I can’t figure out the reason for this yet.
On “beauty;” In fact, any person who will want to make the distinction (i.e., a person who doesn’t like Asians) will not differentiate between full Asian and half, even if you don’t look Asian. Go on any website discussing white looking Eurasians like Adam Smith or Cary Fukunaga, and the comments are there.
I’ve come across many Hapas who complained of feeling embarrassed while walking with their parents. I have experienced this too, but moreso, more when walking with my father (as my mother is dead).
Regardless of their intentions, (and I know my parents’ were bad), the assumptions made that my father was an Asiaphile, a loser, or couldn’t get a white woman are there. In my case, they were true, but I don’t think most people bother to differentiate when it’s so common. Obviously, there will be exceptions to this rule, particularly among less intelligent Hapas, like my brother.
It’s frankly impossible for a Eurasian to not notice the interracial imbalance unless they come from entirely white states.
I think many Eurasians that you meet on the street, especially the tall, good looking ones, tend to favor White women (if they can) out of a subconscious rejection of the “white-fever” and “yellow-fever” they are associated with by extension, in any major American city. Another thing could be their rejection of their Asian side, as it is obvious to them that looking Asian is frankly a death sentence. Part of me thinks that Eurasian women do this too, mostly out of a repugnance for their own mothers… if you go read some of the comments on this blog, there are a ton of Eurasian girls complaining about emotional abuse from their mothers.
Why do Asian women love white men? Is it because Asian men are unattractive? Is it because Asian men are patriarchal assholes?
The answer is that it doesn’t matter; the outcome is the same. A Eurasian male. Having children and giving them a good life goes well beyond being able to have mutual attraction and having sex; and even if the mutual attraction is structured as such because of biological or political reasons, the fact remains that the child is still stuck with the outcome of being an Eurasian male (and more often than not, an ASIAN LOOKING MALE) born to a man and woman who cared little for the issues of Asian men.
So a lot of people have contrarily been claiming that I am either Asian, or fully White (which makes even less sense).
The truth is I don’t think I could mentally handle being fully Asian. I admit that I am partially biased after moving to China in an attempt to work and start a new life, under the assumption that I would be accepted.
When I first arrived in China, I was oddly enough in a phase where I believed that I was white – I thought literally by some divine miracle that I had managed to be totally white despite having an Asian mother. (I mean that I really believed this. I thought God had somehow “chosen” me; i.e., mental illness).
It was then later that I was constantly called “laowai”, and viewed as being a foreigner that I became self conscious; after that, I became more and more aware of the fact that as I got older, I looked more and more Asian, and when I photographed pictures, I looked Asian. When I gelled my hair – people would mistake me for fully Chinese, or at least “you look like a Chinese” (in broken English).
It then dawned on me why for so long I had attempted to hide my heritage and if indeed I was privileged – but yet not privileged as the blue eyed / blond haired men that are fabled to run around Asia getting thousands of lays.
It then dawned on me that the combination of all of these factors found their root in having a mother who was just like the Asian women I saw around me who chased foreigners; my insecurity and flirtation with white supremacy all stemmed from a deep seated self hatred and from the lack of having parents who were able to instill proper self esteem in me, and even if they had the subconscious micro aggressions that I as a Hapa receive from White males and Asian women around me are a constant reminded of exactly who I am, and who I am not.
Frankly it DOES NOT MAKE SENSE that a Hapa child can have healthy development since these relationships are so common and often times so vile; and I challenge anyone to really answer the question why these relationships are so common and how the children born from them are able to be raised by two people so diametrically opposed to their own self interests.
In short, we Hapa men, are Asian men born from Asian women who thought Asian men were inferior or unattractive or unmarriageable in every way; and our fathers were racist (or clueless) enough to support this by virtue of their desire for sex and partnership.
We Hapas / Eurasians / Half-Asian people are almost overwhelming born from white fathers, implying that Asian features, when on a male, indicate undesirability, not only romantically, but by society itself.
The myth of “Hapa / half-Asian beauty” is just a myth, and if we are not beautiful, or just look Asian, we are just reminded that Asian men are at the bottom of the hierarchy socially, romantically, as evidenced by even our own mothers’ choices. The entire value of Hapas then, becomes his looks or his ability to not look Asian, and if he fails to meet this criteria he will be poorly equipped to deal with it.
Claims of cultural flaws of Asian men also conveniently coincide with Asian men being rated the least desirable. Moreover, my father as with many other Hapas’ fathers was an extreme cultural conservative and vitriolic anti-feminist.
Don’t believe me, ask for proof and I’ll provide; I literally am taking a monumental risk writing this blog as the details are fairly specific. There is nothing on this website that can be refuted logically.
My father was borderline-autistic, unable to make eye contact, and saw Asian women as a “replacement white woman” when he was unable to get a white woman; my mother saw his blue eyes and height and saw him as a ticket to integration and higher status in her new life in the west.
It simply does not make sense for an Asian woman who, like millions of others, views Asian men as worthless, then has a half Asian son, and expect him to accept this, rationally. There is no political thesis or alignment that can explain the massive imbalance other than one that is self evident to no one but the children of these relationships and this blog looks to understand and expose them.
Asian women and their insistence on marrying and having children with white men is not something based on love, but rather (at worst) on hate (largely of Asian men) or at best un-attraction,yet their sons are Asian men and we are taught from birth that love is not colorblind (I’ll discuss how loveless and hateful my parents’ marriage was, later in this essay).
I have come across enough Asian women who thought I was beneath them, to believe that all of us, their sons, must resent and hate our parents in order to truly punish them. Contrarily, embracing this and finding solace in hedonism with white women would effectively mean that I have to admit that I am able to do so because I am half-White; and this is not a moral or healthy choice. I would rather embrace my Asianness and expose these issues – as very few other Hapas are willing to. I no longer want to sit by and watch the hypocrisy and hatred flying through the Asian community and the effect this has on people much more susceptible than me (as you can see how susceptible I was two years ago).
For reference, I am in my 20’s, look similar to a whiter version of Hong Kong celebrity Daniel Wu (the kind of Hapa that looks white to some; Asian to others; yet photographs more Asian; porcelain white skin that sunburns, very dark brown, thick and difficult to maintain hair, brown-greenish eyes, hairless chest and arms but hairy legs), am Ivy League educated and from a considerably wealthy Chinese American family on the East Coast (the wealth is not mine, directly). I also have one mentally ill brother, in his 30’s, unemployed, institutionalized and a virgin, who looks significantly more Asian than me. My father was, when younger, 6’3″, blue eyed, red haired and with a large beard, my mother 5’3″ or 5’4″, slender, with dyed red hair, colored contacts, and a sexless and unhappy marriage as long as I can remember.
We are lauded up as some kind of beautiful Hapa miracle children, but in reality we are born out of nothing other than cultural fetishization and the pursuit of certain physical attributes, neither of which we are capable of having, since we are, after all, Asian men.
Only after we are born do our parents begin to panic and start trying to instill self-esteem in us by teaching us about our heritage, falsely encouraging us to believe that we will be accepted by whites, or worse, by Asians, the same Asians that our mothers were trying to escape from. The irony of teaching Hapas to be proud to be Asian when Asian women are willfully throwing themselves at white men, is staggering.
But it’s obvious by just going outside, where you can see White male / Asian woman couples sitting next to other white male / Asian woman couples they don’t even know – that love is not colorblind, and as a Eurasian male this became evident to me in my teens, despite the fact that I do not look that Asian.
In fact, Hapas and Eurasians are still treated as Asians by discerning whites (anyone who bothers to make the distinction will not make the distinction between full, and half) turned down not only by white women but by also Asian women, subject to jokes and insults by the white majority where he is, and then outcast by full Asians who view him as an oddity.
Hapas and Eurasians are supposed to merely accept that white men were the ideal in their mothers’ eyes, and that no matter what we will never be the full white person, or allowed entry into white culture, the same one that our mothers had such an easy time integrating with.
The only reason that talking about this is taboo is because of our culture in which such sensitive subjects of race and gender are immediately shut down in favor of a sugar-coated anti-reality that seeks to ignore that the vast, vast, vast majority of Eurasians have white fathers. So we literally see hundreds of thousands of Eurasians with white last names parading around like they are unique, when really we represent the obvious failings of Asian men to procreate.
The above picture describes my parents to an absolute T.
2016 update: I stopped, then started to continue to add people to this list because the news keeps aggregating and aggregating. 2016 has seen several national news stories featuring Eurasians – every single one with a white father and Asian mother.
Does anyone want to explain why virtually every single Eurasian / Hapa who commits a crime has a white father and an Asian mother?
The single largest mixed race demographic on earth – all uniformly born to white fathers (literally the last people on earth who understand what it’s like to be non-white) and Asian mothers (literally the last people on earth who care) – the only predictable factor among a million unpredictable social elements.
Could it maybe have to do with the fact that SOME of the people who get involved in these relationships present us with a highly politicized relationship involving the superiority of white men, passive aggressive myths about Eurasian beauty and abilities, and psychosexual microaggressions designed to demean Asian people? While my father never badmouthed Asian men – I can only imagine being the son of raceplayers, or women who make a show of their distaste for Asian blood. And I had it bad.
Not all, of course, but let’s be honest that there are many Asian women who chase white men out of a passionate hatred for Asian men, and there are white men who are happy to sleep with them, disrespect the hell out of their Asian partners, not thinking that their son will look totally Asian. From the Sarong Party Girls, to the LA valley girls who dye their hair… where does this all lead besides some of us being in a really bad place… and there are some incredible selfish white guys who get off on being worshipped for their whiteness and think that their children won’t have problems. Really? Really?
Unless someone can accurately provide a plan under which a massive amount of Hapas, the majority of whom are born to Asian women who hate, dislike, disregard or disfavor Asian men and Asian blood, can uniformly come to terms with such a nihilistic and overwhelming slap in the face, then these crimes are going to continue happening.
I know so because as the son of people like this, I can understand the overwhelming feelings of desperation, anger, and hatred. Just go to the first pages of this blog!
I will explain why I think so after the list, and you can deduce why this is happening based on my personal experiences listed elsewhere on this website (hopefully as you go backwards in time you will see how my psychological issues worsen and worsen the earlier and earlier you go).
This is objective from aggregate data. Obviously there are hundreds we probably don’t know about, but I think it’s fair that we tally the ones we know of so far, despite research not being completed.
What’s telling isn’t that there are so many. There aren’t, relative to the total number of Hapas. What’s telling is that they are so massively unbalanced according to the parents.
If you think I’m lying, go ahead and list cases that I missed.
George Woldt, wanton abduction, torture, rape and murder of college student Jacine Gielinski in 1997. “His own mother is Korean and apparently Woldt never accepted his Asian ancestry and wished his mother dead for having had him.”
Steven Parker. White Father, Vietnamese Mother. Double Homicide, Kidnapping, Robbery. 2005. sources
Gerald Powers. White Father, Taiwanese Mother. Murder and aggravated robbery. 1966. source
Michael Blair. White Father. Thai Mother. Sexual Assault and Rape of multiple children. Early 90’s. source
George Wilkerson. White Father. Korean Mother. Murder. 2005. source
I would even go so far as to include my own brother, who has been bed ridden for 15 years after being diagnosed for schizophrenia, unable to keep a job.
The recent events in the news shows that almost 40 years after immigration laws were passed allowing Asians to immigrate to the U.S., the first batch of 2nd generation Hapas are coming of age; I consider myself among the older Hapas born in the mid 80’s, and it’s no surprise to me that we are now seeing the younger Hapas act out violently. The mental illness that crippled my brother is a legitimate thing for Hapas. The severe issues I had with my psychology was bad enough to push me to thoughts similar to those exhibited by some of these criminals. Luckily, I was able to pinpoint the source before anything drastic happened.
Above, I, with the help of some other Hapas, have compiled a list of Hapa / Eurasian / Half White criminals. They have been divided into categories, those with Asian mothers, and those with White mothers.
After a year of research, myself and some others have found four total Eurasian criminals with Asian fathers, compared to dozens from the other category.
The bottom line for what’s going on is this: Asian women dislike Asian men yet produce half-Asian sons who feel psychological emasculated and seek to emulate Whiteness, which itself is seen as the ticket to being loved and accepted; moreover, since white men often marry Asian women because they have too extreme right-wing views to be acceptable to white women, the child itself is also conditioned with these views. Lastly, as Asian women primarily concern themselves with integration and liberation from Asian male-ness, they put little thought into the mental health of their half-Asian children who have difficulty grasping the concept of being Asian, yet having parents who hated Asian men.
Hence we see a commonality among these criminals, with Asian mothers, wherein their crimes focus largely around sexual violence, violence against minorities, and in several cases, matricide.
A Eurasian boy born from an Asian woman who spent her entire life hating and avoiding Asian men will be mentally unhealthy as the child itself is still an Asian male and it is biologically impossible for a Hapa child to be white; it is impossible for the child to spend his entire life hating and denying his heritage, as his mother wished she were able to. I lost 60 pounds in a single summer in an attempt to look whiter.
A Hapa boy born from a white man and a woman of color who places inherent value on whiteness will be mentally unhealthy as we still remain Asian in the eyes of society and have only the reminder of own expulsion by our mothers’ behavior.
A Hapa boy raised to be white and who lives in terror of his Asian heritage (I refused to look at photos of myself for almost 10 years for fear of seeing Asian features, refused to ever grow my hair out so that it wouldn’t be a darker color, adamantly denied I was half Chinese for years, and refused to even look at my own parents’ photograph for fear of being reminded that I was Asian, and even to this day in late 2015 have difficulty looking at myself in the mirror) will live in mental agony.
A Hapa boy or girl born from a self-hating Asian woman and the man who tolerates it, and has no idea how to raise an Asian son, because of its advantageous to him and his desire for sex / companionship / or in my case, “traditional marriage” will mentally unhealthy
A boy raised by a father and mother who have no idea about and / or reinforce the stereotypes about Asian men being undesirable will bementally unhealthy especially if the Asian son has no Asian father figure in his life.
A Eurasian boy born from the systemic imbalance of power between Asian women and Asian men will be mentally unhealthy.
A Eurasian son born to a woman who believes Asian men to be unworthy of her affection and by extension even existing will be mentally unhealthy.