IF ASIAN WOMEN ARE WORLD-FAMOUS FOR HAVING "WHITE FEVER" AND HATING ASIAN MEN, WHAT HAPPENS WHEN THEY HAVE A SON WHO LOOKS ASIAN? WHAT HAPPENS WHEN ASIAN WOMEN SAY "NO ASIAN MEN," AND HALF ASIAN SONS HEAR THE SAME? I HAPPEN. THIS IS THE BLOG OF A DARTMOUTH EDUCATED EURASIAN SON OF A RACIST, NAZI-SYMPATHIZING, HOLOCAUST DENYING, HOMOPHOBIC CONSERVATIVE, UNDEREMPLOYED, CONSPIRACY THEORIST WHITE MAN AND A HONG KONG WOMAN WHO HAD "WHITE FEVER," DOCUMENTING THE IMMENSE DAMAGE AND ABUSE DONE OVER 20 YEARS OF LIVING UNDER ONE OF THE MOST HATEFUL, RACIST PAIRINGS ON EARTH. FORMER NEO-NAZI, FORMER EXTREME RACIST, AND YES, HALF ASIAN.
Once in a while, I will come upon a half Asian guy who bashes his own heritage. I used to do the same, but I never bashed my mother other than when telling white guys that “Asian women are not that submissive.” Other than that, I was plagued by nightmares of my mother for ten years, and for ten years constantly made fun of Asian people. My relationship to my mother was… non-emotional. Sometimes I imagined that I had no mother, that I was just, somehow, born. I didn’t feel Asian, nor did I want to be, nor did I want to be associated with the woman that she was.
When Asian women marry white men – they do so not because half Asians are attractive, but because white men are more attractive for whatever reason.
My guess is that it’s because Asian women feel white – or at least that they have a place in “superior” White Western culture. One that is a lot more de facto “high class” or “high culture” by virtue of being white. Love is certainly not colorblind – especially when I was at the top of my class, funny, outgoing, and yet heard “I only date white guys, sorry.”
I guess I missed the cut on being that super hot half Asian.
I mean, white male / Asian woman couples are so common because it’s clear that Asian women just don’t want Asian partners. No other race of women acts like they do; white women marry out, but at a rate of 5%. When Asian women marry out – they go for the most Aryan phenotype that they can get; tall is good, blue eyes is great, extra masculine is very, very good. My dad was two for three – maybe even two-point-five for three.
The goal is to have a white-passing son, and they will be happy. No complaints, a happy social life, white looks, a normal chance at a normal life. This is the ultimate goal.
It’s easy to be “proud” to be Asian – without having to look like it. You can laugh off the jokes, you can claim you’re Hapa without having to deal with the fallout. It’s an added benefit if you are 6’3″, athletic, and very good looking – but I fell three inches too short.
For whatever reason, the ultimate goal is to create white children, without having to change their race; Asian women can just wing it. And until that point they will just sleep with white men, take the brunt of literally every joke about Asian women being white-worshippers, to the point that their children are simply white.
This is why Hapa pride is a joke. Relying on a Eurasian male to have any sensitivity to racial issues is laughable, as long as he can party and have sex and have a hot girlfriend. And I guess this is what our Asian mothers were really hoping for – a son that can just survive in this wasteland of partying and having sex. They might slap on a Chinese or Japanese name, or give you a Chinese middle name but the result is the same. For some reason they can’t see the logic as to why Half Asian males hate being Asian and rather just pass off as white, especially in Western society, which Asian women desperately want to integrate into. After the first fifteen hundred times of hearing “of course it’s your mom who is Asian,” and “you’re handsome (because of your white father)”, half Asian pride becomes stupid.
I was one of those. I would make fun of the Chinese accent, sing fake Chinese songs, even bully some Asian friends. My non-Asian friends thought this was funny, and they encouraged it. After all – nobody wants to fuck an Asian guy. Everyone wants to fuck that cool White guy.
That was until the “I don’t really like Asian guys” started.
Now you can understand why it’s so hard to find a half Asian guy who will date Asian women; because I think, deep down, they all know that we’re just luckier than full Asian men, that even Asian women like our mothers reject in droves. So while these guys might, on paper, claim that they are proud – the bulk of them reject their Asian heritage, and with them, Asian women. Even though they might like them. The real saddest part of half Asian identity is that most of us essentially acknowledge the irony of the situation – that no matter what, we’re better off – and our mothers?
Well – how could we ever take them seriously, knowing this? How could you take seriously a woman who tells you to be proud yet her and all her sisters and friends married white men? The writing is on the wall. How could you respect an Asian woman who threw herself at white men – the same white men who built a universal culture that hates half of us – that humiliates half Asian men for being Asian?
This seals the deal on the issue forever. I don’t want to hear any more sociological musings coming from obscure university offices.
I’ll tell everyone here a real ugly truth. I married my wife because I love her dearly. I married her because I was proud to be Chinese, my mother had encouraged me to marry Chinese, and after all these years, I still considered myself Chinese and left America looking for a place that I could die in peace, and wouldn’t feel so worthless anymore. And there are days that I regret it. I regret it so much. Because I don’t want my children to suffer. And because I simply have no way to explain to them how their lives are worth less – according to millions of women who look like my mother. Chinese women actually make me regret marrying Chinese, for the same reason that many half-Asians don’t want anything to do with them.
But that’s the American Dream, right? Party, fuck, don’t complain; send some money to people in Africa, but never complain. As long as you’re white, or damn near white, don’t complain.
I am a formerly well liked, handsome, outgoing, popular, Dartmouth educated Eurasian man – a literal brown haired, hazel eyed dream Hapa boy – born to a mentally ill, violent, Chinese mother who sought out marriage into the powered WASP class – but then realized too late that the man she married was an underemployed, emotionally damaged, meek, rapidly balding, hyper-racist, hyper-conservative conspiracy theorist male who was an “Asiaphile” who wanted a “traditional, chaste Asian wife who wouldn’t sleep with black men” – and she essentially killed herself. At around age 20 I encountered anti-Asian racism (ironically from Asian women in my own family and white “friends” who actually liked Asian women because they were easy) and due to inheriting my father’s entitlement to the world and being raised to be superior, I was unprepared to deal with it; I am emotionally unstable, self-loathing, deeply mentally disturbed, addicted, underemployed, have strong intimacy issues, and to this day still unable to undo the damage that the Eurasian myths and family’s racism did to me, and unable to form proper relationships due to my self-hatred instilled on me during the first 20 years of my life. Unlike other Eurasians who find self-esteem in underpaid modeling jobs, are gay, permavirgins, or leverage their half-whiteness to Asian women, my self-implosion has been broadcast to the world to the point that I am internet famous. I am not afraid to be as viciously honest as I need to be in order to speak on the reality of this world.
If you don’t think this website is valid – go to Reddit.com/r/hapas, which received 13.5 million views in 2 years, and 2 million views in the last two months. Also – find half Asians with Asian fathers and compare their behavior to those with Asian mothers.
There are very specific issues with being the children of anti-feminist, racist, unattractive white men, and self hating Asian women who try as hard as they can to integrate and create white children, due to their hatred at their marginalization, and their hatred of their undefined facial features.
There are very specific issues pertinent to the “je ne sais quoi” of white men and Asian women, and the incredibly weird, unbalanced, uncomfortable, fetishized “dynamic” of “superior White man,” and “dainty, beautiful Asian woman.”
None of these apply to the children of Asian fathers. Almost every single part-Asian that people use to justify the superiority of Half Asians involves a Half Asian with an Asian father or grandfather (or both): Keanu Reeves, Dean Cain, Brandon Lee, and his father Bruce Lee. The reason why the sons and daughters of Asian men and white women fare better is simply because they are raised to not view whiteness as a superior entity; which both of my parents did, both of them being white supremacists.
Asian women specifically hate Asian men – and hope to create Eurasian children in order to raise their status; White men use Asian women as a means to get laid, provided that they are unable to do so with non-Asian women, whereby meaning that Eurasian childrens’ only value is to look as un-Asian as possible, meaning that Eurasian children are highly prone to mental illness, extremely racist parents, and broken homes. Failing to look attractive (our primary stereotype), means that many Half Asians just look Asian – which are essentially the bottom of the barrel in the racial hierarchy in the West. This also doesn’t take into account the extreme, cruel, controlling, demeaning, calculating nature of Asian women, where they explicitly hope their children look White, so that Asian women can feel “superior” in wresting the White woman’s status and power away from her at the side of the White man.
Asian women are the ONLY race that explicitly goes out of their way to attack men of Asian appearance in an attempt to integrate and raise their own value. I do NOT like Asian women, firstly because they are physically unattractive (the fact that they look constantly angry, and the fact that they seem to have no life to their appearance, and just look like they’re always scheming), and also because their behavior is off-putting, controlling, hateful, calculating, and rude, as many others have noticed about them; they seem to pick lower status, unattractive white, and only white men, while Asian and Eurasian men will marry anyone, while Asian women only marry white males. Asian women will actually go out of their way to attack Eurasian men, as well, in a desperate attempt to bring Asian looking men down with them, and lower status, unattractive white men will use this as a ways to validate their whiteness – at the expense of anyone of Asian appearance, including Half Asian men. Asian women will attempt to control their Asian looking sons’ dating choices – pushing them towards Asian women; while white men who marry Asian women will act upon their insecurity and lack of control of their marriage, and lash out at Asian men, black men, and white women. Asian women are so unattractive that they pursue bottom of the barrel men of all races, men who are unable to get White women (their first choices), putting Half Asian children in danger. They will also go out of their way to ensure their flimsy “status,” my assaulting or attacking non-Asian women who are sympathetic to or even date Asian men, out of fear that the equal status of Asian men will reveal that Asian women are in fact not as good as they think they are.
Even Kip Fulbeck, king of all Hapas, admitted that the Hapa male process of self-hatred is such a problem, that it should be a cause for concern.
Imagine being raised by two racists – your own parents. Your own mother wanted a white man, yet here you are – a half Asian, a man who looks very Asian. Except you have a white father. Is it possible to raise a healthy child considering the loaded, white-worshipping nature of yellow fever and white fever? How can a biracial child be expected to be normal if he looks Asian, and the entire basis of his parents’ relationship was that the man not be Asian? How can Asian women outmarry at such high rates, have an open ‘white fetish,’ and expect Asian looking sons to be emotionally well adjusted?
In short: I am the son of a foreign born Asian woman from Hong Kong who deliberately married a tall (6’3″, skinny), red-haired, blue eyed, bearded white man. She, like many Asian women, sought out a man who had a “Western” background so that she could feel integrated into her new home, and better than her fully Asian peers. She was by and large mentally ill, violent, abusive, cruel towards my father when he wasn’t making enough money, extremely controlling, and had self-image issues, changing her entire appearance to “look white.” She did not and never did love my father, and only used him because he was white; their entire marriage was violent, loveless (father sleeping on the floor for fifteen years), and calculating.
This man (a semi-famous paleoconservative Homophobic activist on par with the Westboro Baptist Church) was interested in Asian culture and married because he was socially unable to marry a white or non-Asian woman due to his political beliefs and personality quirks (he is very socially conservative, very racist against blacks, Hispanics and Muslims, a Holocaust denier and anti-Semite, extremely over the top homophobic, very shy, not many friends, belief that white women are too liberated, extremely distasteful of feminism, extremely meek and unable to make eye contact with others, steps off the sidewalk when larger men approach, unwilling to work or make money for fear of violating Christian scripture). His interest in Asian culture was largely dictated by his personality – in which he idealized Asian cultures as being more honorable and traditional, and mistook “white worship” (a cultural tick in which Asian women see themselves as less beautiful than white women and marry white men for status and integration), for “traditionalism” and “submissiveness.”
I was raised largely as a white child, yet turned more Asian in appearance with age. I was raised in an environment that had an undercurrent of anti-Asian male racism (America), saw Asian women (including five out of six of them in my own family, all of them, including my own parents divorced or separated – my mother being dead) throw themselves at white men (the majority of whom are racists, Republicans, or short and or meek), and also an over-current of false Eurasian myths about beauty and intelligence. I subconsciously always believed myself to be “less” because my own mother and her sisters all were married to white men and adamantly denied I was Asian for a decade.
My parents’ relationship, as was the case in every single one of my female relatives, was loveless, violent and broken due to her disillusionment with my father after ten years as he failed to make enough money, and grew balder and fatter and no longer lived up to the White male Prince Charming she had wanted (separate bedrooms, forced to sleep on the couch, extreme violent fighting). My brother and I suffered extreme psychological and physical abuse (beaten with coat hangers by our mother, Tiger Mommed, had her threaten to kill herself with a butcher knife in front of us, threatened to crash the car with us in it while driving at 90 mph), and her behavior became worse and worse as she realized that her white husband wasn’t making as much money as her brother and sister, who both married Chinese partners. This is a story of someone who was very sick, and in recovery.
The behavior of Asian women, in particular, is like nothing else on earth, to the point that you can see the majority of all stories about abusive parents on Reddit’s AsianParentStories sub – complain about the mothers, including the second generation Asian mothers – like Amy Chua – who metamorphosize into the Tiger Mothers that they hate, despite claiming to hate Asian men. Celeste Ng, a New York Times best-selling author, personally attacked me, after I pointed out that her book “Everything I Never Told You” was based on the broken WMAF families in her friends’ circle, yet she had written it about a family involving an Asian father. Asian women have proven themselves to be extremely hostile against non-Asian women, something out of their deep self-loathing and cultural proclivity towards integration and status, wherein love is secondary if not nonexistent in favor of maintaining status, face, and power over women who they view, deep down, as more beautiful than them. They will even go so far as to attack Asian male / non-Asian female couples, and force their Eurasian children (like me) to marry Asian, in an attempt to maintain an image of false superiority over non-Asian women; (e.g., that Asian women are the most beautiful, when they are not, and heavily rely on yellow fever and male desperation for their feeling of integration and desirability).
When I got older, despite the fact that society told me that I was “unique” for being Eurasian, I was treated with contempt by both white people AND Asian people; Asian women would often express disgust at me for being Asian (scowling at me on the street, or smirking), and white people would constantly remind me that I was Asian in a way to demean and undermine me. Several of my “friends,” who were engineers and nerdy, actually would take every opportunity to remind me of my Asianness, while sleeping with Asian women, as Asian women were all they could get. This caused me to self implode from a popular, outgoing Eurasian to becoming a recluse and suicidal. My insanity grew more and more pervasive as I fantasized about cutting out my eyes to make them deeper, refused to look in the mirror for five years,
Two years after writing the below, I am leaving it word for word, as I wrote it, as proof of how I felt and feelings I still struggle with as a male of Asian heritage who clearly looks Asian, born to a mother who thought of Asian men as beneath her. I am highly educated, formerly well liked, popular, handsome, out going and like many Eurasians I burned out in my twenties with the realization that people, even Asian women in my Asian family,hate my Asian side,so now I’ve turned my talents towards exposing the last bastion of White supremacy in the world as candidly as I can. I am literally dissectingWhite male / Asian women couples and the Eurasian identity to a degree that nobody else ever has.
I actually moved to China (which saved my life) in order to escape racism and feelings of inferiority – and was shocked on learning that my own mother (and many other Chinese) had moved to America in order to find the American dream – a dream that hated me for my Asian blood.
I highly recommend that any potential parent to half-Asian children make sure that they are marrying on a clean slate – with zero fetishism, zero white-worship, and zero undertones of racial hierarchies – and that they be completely honest about this, to avoid sending more young man down the path that I went. Hapa males in particular need special consideration due to the fact that we have zero privilege, and yet are raised by two people who want privilege without having to do any of the work.
I am doing this for every single half-Asian kid out there who has committed suicide, thought about suicide, suffered from racism, isolation, outcasting, and had two parents whose entire relationship was nothing but lust, selfishness, even hatred – leaving us with nothing but perpetual isolation. The world does not care about Hapa males if you look average or even a little bit Asian. The world – even Asian women, who truly believe that they are white – only care about whiteness and white men.
The minute that anyone can tell me how an Asian looking Hapa who watches his own mother throw herself at non-Asian men can develop into a well rounded individual – let me know.
But I’ve heard through the grapevine about some “well adjusted Hapas.”
I’ve heard this a lot, but anyone who has ever known adult Hapas realize that many of us have severe problems.
I’d chalk this up to any number of things, one largely being the Tiger Mom, one being that ones own mother is a sociopath who rewarded white supremacy, one being that ones own father deliberately attempted to exert dominance over Asianness – i.e., children being raised by “raceplayers” (such as, white men who get off on sexual dominance over Asian women, just look up and Asian raceplay blog), one being the inability of the white father to correctly parent the half-Asian son (my father treating me essentially as a white child, never exposing me to Asian media), one being that due to the whole scale behavior of Asian women, identifying as Asian is largely a practice in masochism.
But by and large the issue is of looks.
If you meet a well adjusted “Hapa” – six out of ten times he will look almost completely white. And even then – like in the case of Daniel Holtzclaw or Elliot Rodger – the issues still linger. Three out of ten times, he won’t admit it, despite being an extremely passive aggressive type, emotionally unstable, perpetually single, and unwilling to badmouth his parents. One out of ten times the guy will be gay – either openly, but more likely, in the closet, out of fear of offending his conservative parents.
I came close to looking white, very white. But more than enough times I’ve been told that I look Asian, that I have an “Asian vibe,” that girls “don’t date Asians.” And my brother – who looks full blown Asian – is 32, a virgin, but luckily too steeped in filial piety and his own mental illness that he would never even bother to question these things and is likely going to wind up dying without a kiss.
But more so, when I was between 18-24 or so, I passed as white. I passed as 100% white – people largely thought I was Russian except for the discerning types, who made a point to call me out on my Asian heritage in an attempt to belittle me. And that was when I realized that being Hapa wasn’t something to be proud of.
Being Hapa was never something to be proud of. It was largely a lie pushed onto us by hateful Asian women who sought out white men for integration, assimilation, money, status, or whiter kids; they put no thought into it other than slapping it with a general label of “beautiful Hapas” and gave us no roadmap at all for navigating a racist world – one that Asian women were themselves complicit in.
Frankly – if you look white, why would you even bother identifying as Asian unless you absolutely had to? Not only is there a monumental stigma against Asian males in any Western countries, but you would subject yourself to repeated comments from both men and women alike regarding your heritage. And no white-passing Hapa would ever be able to stomach full blown anti-Asian racism directed at them. At other Asians, sure, but not at them.
One of the most offensive things to me is when non-Asians make comments about Asian people assuming that I won’t care. Such as:
“I don’t go to that library, there are way too many Asians in there.”
“So and so friend (who is Asian) blends right in here,” (when walking through Chinatown).
“Yeah, Asians are known for running cash-only scams and skimming to avoid tax.” (Maybe true but who gives a shit?)
The vast, vast, vast majority of time when you encounter a Hapa with problematic issues – he will look Asian. Are there Asian looking Hapas who are well adjusted? I’m sure there are, too, but I’m betting my bottom dollar still waters run deep.
This isn’t an opinion. I’m asking my readers to go out and actually meet these people because I know they exist.
And when there is a Hapa who stands up and says that people like me are lunatics – I am right here telling him, as a person who could pass as white without enough concerted effort – that they’re only behaving that way (i.e., “carefree”) because they have no experience being treated like an Asian.
Apparently with the way I look I am treated as Asian by only the most discerning – but that’s what counts. Even a little bit of Asian blood is enough to earn the hatred of people who care enough to make the distinction. Even Asian women have done this to me.
So “white passing” happy-go-lucky Hapas who try to deny these issues, yet probably are the most arrogant little friendless shitheads in real life, or are so deeply damaged at a core level yet whose egotism doesn’t allow them to admit it, or are closeted homosexuals, or are passive aggressive little pricks who balk at the idea of being called Asian, or those obsessive types who just love comparing themselves to Keanu Reeves, and never any other celebrity – don’t take their word seriously.
How would they know?
Want to know just how right I am? Next time you meet a Hapa, just tell him to his face that he looks full Asian and watch his reaction.
Saw these comments on my blog posted elsewhere on the web.
Asian women preferring white men, and outright rejecting men of their own race, is strange and even seems unnatural, but I’m not a psychiatrist or anthropologist. I would think that people would instinctively prefer their own race/ethnicity for group association and especially bond-pairing and having children. Could this behavior be considered a mental illness? How much of this is learned behavior (e.g., social programming/conditioning) and how much is biological or instinctive?
You guys seem to underestimate the psychological toll of being mixed race, and also having WMAW shoved in your face. Think it emasculates Asian men? It fucks us up more.
What’s the problem here? You know for a fact for so many Asian women to openly despise Asian men, that there’s something going on. So why would your own sons be different?
Because you’re a “good father?” Because you encourage them to “work out?” Because Asian men have never worked out before?
By oversimplifying it you guys really, really, REALLY took a huge gamble. The next few decades should be interesting.
You guys missed the big point: Asian women are actively rejecting Asian men in droves, both in Asia and the West. Why on earth do you think this can be surmounted with petty advice? Will or will not your own son be Asian?
I can believe a chunk of it – and how it could possibly screw someone up.
As I laid it out for Quartermain on my blog, nobody actually knows the mental processes and social background of those girls who chase western men. After all: if your mom is nuts, and projects that nuttiness onto you, you’re going to go just a little bit weird and loopy in many ways as a natural consequence.
Which is going to be “interesting” for the children of single mommies. Especially the male children.
There are obviously exceptions, however the examples I know of happen exactly like described. I knew a couple of Thai girls who were half British and they had an amazing time at university living in Australia getting invited everywhere and talked to by both Thai and whites.
One of their brothers came over thinking Australia was welcoming and found himself always tagging along with his big sister because no one wanted to know him on his own.
He dropped out, gained 40kg and moved back in with his parents and is a stoner/gamer.
His sister married a successful Thai businessman and goes to all the big corporate functions as a trophy wife.
He was a nice enough guy, just the whole introverted shy Asian thing is much more attractive in girls than it is in guys.
At this point I am just putting out these posts to fill the gaps in the search engines for these issues, hence the excessive tagging… for a long time coming. The point of this site is to exist for at least another decade, and my ultimate goal is to make this into the premier website on half-Asian issues, replace all previous discussion of half-Asian issues (e.g., the Kip Fulbeck Camp, Hapavoices, etc.) and so far everything is going according to plan.
I need to reiterate that my dad is racist. He very much hates black people; when buying a Christmas gift yesterday I had to avoid making a certain purchase because I didn’t want to buy a very well known brand owned by a very prominent rapper (now owned by Apple). I went with a lesser known brand because I knew he would never use the aforementioned “black brand.”
My father is also a Holocaust denier, constantly talks about the immigrant crisis in Syria, refers to black people as “the blacks,” so on and so forth. Luckily he’s not a Trump supporter as he believes that Trump is overcome with greed – an anti-Christian principle.
Luckily my dad was never racist against Asians, but apparently there are a lot of white men in relationships with Asian women who hate Asian men even worse. The potential blowback for this is massive.
Anyways, racist white men often times seek out Asian women. Why?
A) Asian women are well known to defer to white men, rarely to black men.
B) Asian women are known for their “traditional values”; i.e., they love living in white countries, and are outspoken in their hatred for black people and are not notorious as white women (although this is a myth) for sleeping with black men.
C) Like Dylan Roof said, Asians are an “honorable race.” Hence their women are honorable women. The only basis for their “honor” would be their perceived value of whiteness.
D) White men with extreme racist views cannot attract white women; so they go for Asian women, who will forgive their views in exchange for whiter babies, (likely before summarily dropping their husbands, like mother did). The whiter babies will then be raised as white, like Marcus Epstein.
E) The largest irony is that Asians are seen as “genetically the most similar” to whites, (my dad has told me that “East and West are the same”), so the children have a much higher chance of looking white (or in my case, whitish), so it’s essentially killing two birds with one stone.
Do not fall for this! I will make sure this website dominates Google rankings from here on in to ensure that these crimes do not go unpunished! If you know people like this, cut them out of your life, but do not blame the children.
When you have a son, your privilege as a blue-eyed white male is thrown out the door.
Whereas, if your partner were constantly complimenting your blue eyes, your son will not be able to leverage his blue eyes in order to secure a mate. He will instead have to rely on different factors, and since the number of women, including Asian women, who openly favor Asian men, is much lower, this will be damaging to his emotional well-being. For every Asian woman who deliberately rejected Asian men, so forth will your Eurasian son be rejected. My clash with my monumental ego and narcissism, years back, where I was literally obsessed with my looks, sent me into a rage when I was rejected by a white woman for being Asian (I’ve mentioned this many times before).
On “beautiful Hapa babies.”
This is by and large a lie. All babies are universally cute, but this does not translate to being an attractive male. A desire for a beautiful baby is essentially on par with having a pet; hence you see many divorced Asian women (divorced largely because of their insane behavior, like my mother’s, wherein the child is part of a fantasy) using their children as status symbols. My mother constantly showed me off to her siblings and mentioned my tall nose and deep eyes whereas ostracizing my father, but again, this does not translate to necessary success in the future; it is borderline narcissism wherein the love for the child is not love per se, but love as long as [qualifications] exist.
If you do a youtube search for “half asian babies” you will find a number bragging about how their children have blue eyes; despite this being impossible, the idea that such white worship is prevalent is extremely, extremely troublesome.
My case was unusual. My mother seemed to like my brother more than me despite him being black haired, black eyed. She Tiger Mommed him more than me, but less cruelly; I began to think that it was because I was either born via C-section or because I didn’t look like her, or even some kind of resentment towards me. My memory doesn’t go back that far so I can’t figure out the reason for this yet.
On “beauty;” In fact, any person who will want to make the distinction (i.e., a person who doesn’t like Asians) will not differentiate between full Asian and half, even if you don’t look Asian. Go on any website discussing white looking Eurasians like Adam Smith or Cary Fukunaga, and the comments are there.
I’ve come across many Hapas who complained of feeling embarrassed while walking with their parents. I have experienced this too, but moreso, more when walking with my father (as my mother is dead).
Regardless of their intentions, (and I know my parents’ were bad), the assumptions made that my father was an Asiaphile, a loser, or couldn’t get a white woman are there. In my case, they were true, but I don’t think most people bother to differentiate when it’s so common. Obviously, there will be exceptions to this rule, particularly among less intelligent Hapas, like my brother.
It’s frankly impossible for a Eurasian to not notice the interracial imbalance unless they come from entirely white states.
I think many Eurasians that you meet on the street, especially the tall, good looking ones, tend to favor White women (if they can) out of a subconscious rejection of the “white-fever” and “yellow-fever” they are associated with by extension, in any major American city. Another thing could be their rejection of their Asian side, as it is obvious to them that looking Asian is frankly a death sentence. Part of me thinks that Eurasian women do this too, mostly out of a repugnance for their own mothers… if you go read some of the comments on this blog, there are a ton of Eurasian girls complaining about emotional abuse from their mothers.
Asian women that refuse their own men are probably not the best people, by the same rule of thumb that men of other races operate on (e.g., most black men would despise a black woman who hated black men; most white men would despise a white woman who hated white men). Even the Asian women who post here married to white men reveal “telling” character issues.
This is all well and dandy except the marriage results in children who grow up with parents who never actually liked each other and were together for the sake of convenience or fetishism. On top of that we’re constantly reminded that Asian men, which we are, failed to be seen, even by Asian women, as worthy of existing.
Somebody posted this video on Reddit. Looking through the comments it seems a lot of white men came to an agreement. I didn’t watch all of it, maybe the first three minutes but that’s enough to make my commentary.
White men falsely perceive Asian women as being more morally sound. This is incorrect because any morally sound woman wouldn’t idealize the men of another race. This isn’t racist. This is saying that in a moral ideal, races wouldn’t have different values; most men are way too egotistical and / or naive to question the behavior of why a woman likes them.
(The issue becomes much more complex when Asian-looking sons are involved, however; hence I am forced to think about these things while my father is not.)
White men go through their entire lives not overtly being hit on by women, and then an Asian woman does it and they don’t see red flags; despite a decade of being verbally humiliated by my mother (taking his gifts and throwing them against the wall, for example), he still believes her to be an angel because of her “traditional values”.
I’ve been hit on by women of all races. It’s actually fairly common (or was when I was younger, probably not so much now, there is, in my case, a truth to Eurasian beauty; not so much in the case of others). So I understand that women have something called autonomy – they don’t sit around waiting for a “good guy” with XXXXXX bank account to marry.
I’m not talking about approaching women – most men can get dates like that after a certain point in their life after they accumulate enough capital; I’m talking about having certain qualities that make women approach you when you’re young (i.e., looks, good hair, height, narrow-tapered waist and broad shoulders, confidence, non-neurotic behavior).
A lot of white guys go their whole lives never attracting attention from a white woman in the west; they go to Asia and suddenly are approached by Asian women, or are approached by Asian American women, and they think this is indicative of a moral agency, rather than, in objective terms, bias, or even worse, ulterior motives. (By moral agency, I mean that it is assumed that they like “traditional values,” as embodied by a white man).
Most men completely lack the self-awareness and experience to discern between a foreign woman’s “attention” and genuine love, which, if she had been living in her own space for 20-some odd years, would at very least have leveled against a single local guy, at one point in her life.
Anyways, my dad was and is an extreme paleoconservative. But it doesn’t have anything to do with his politics. There was no way in hell he could ever have landed a white woman; to this date he is unable to make prolonged eye contact with most other people. He mistook my mother’s affection for him as a sign of morality when in fact it was his height and blue eyes that were the draw.
Their entire marriage was a hell of death threats, separate bedrooms, swinging knives, verbal abuse, sexlessness, and yet he still couldn’t see it. He couldn’t imagine that a woman that scorned her own race of men wasn’t exactly sane.
The reason he didn’t know this was because he has never been with an Asian woman who liked her own men or a woman who liked Asian men; I am, and the differences are staggering. She adores children, is traditionally beautiful by Chinese standards, constantly gets complimented on her looks, and told me when we first went out that she “would never had said yes were I not half Chinese,” and that her primary qualification for a partner was “stability” and a “stable life.” I’ve also noticed in my life that the women interested in me had a tendency towards real beauty (not just mini-skirt hotness) and came from “normal” backgrounds; i.e., Jewish women, Caribbean immigrants, Indian, Mexican and Polish immigrants.
This is exactly a contrast to a woman who wants “a foreign husband,” because this entails a fantasy about what life with a foreigner is like, and when the fantasy proves to be different from her mental ideal, she will exhibit the childish, psychotic behavior that made her unable to differentiate between fantasy and reality in the first place.
Of course I expect the collective IQ of the “yellow fetishists” who read this blog to be too low to understand this post, so I leave you with the warning that being a piece of shit and marrying a piece of shit is fine.
The problem is that your son will be half-Asian and the ball is up in the air after that.
As if Asian women are going to give a single shit about us… but I’m still posting here as a sort of canary in the coal mine.
My notes: I just started thinking about how Asian women favoring white men doesn’t actually have to do necessarily with self hatred, (although it does), but a desire for “excitement” and “rebellion.” The fact that us Eurasians are left as a result with no solid ethnic identity and that this excitement and rebellion uniformly revolves around that which White men and western culture provides – we are left out of this exciting culture because of our appearance and constantly reminded that we are Asian men, even by the Asian women who are having such a good time “escaping.”
On top of that we’re brought into a world and told that it’s personality and ability that matters… yet we look exactly like the kind of men our mothers and fathers spent decades of their lives laughing at.
Rebellion and excitement is not a foundation for a relationship or for raising a child with healthy self esteem unless the child looks like the object of desire and excitement and even then not so much.
In this way we have so many broken WMAW families and so many broken Hapas who turn to drugs and crime to escape perpetual feelings of inferiority. As Hapas we are expected to just accept that white men are better fathers / sperm donors and take pride in being Asian, in the same breath. Logically it makes no sense.
You need to make sure your husband understands that racism isn’t some made up thing that minorities complain about. He needs to understand that your son WILL have it harder in the dating scene and that he might resent other members of the family. Asian women enjoy a ton of sexual privilege. White men enjoy even more. And Eurasian women (his sisters) are probably the single most desirable demographic when it comes to dating/relationships. Eurasian men are all the way on the other end of the spectrum, doing well with pretty much only Asian girls. DO NOT LIE TO YOUR FUTURE SON. DO NOT TELL HIM HIS RACE OR GENDER DO NOT MATTER. Why AMWF hapas are so normal by comparison is that they don’t desperately and obsessively wish they were white 24/7 because they identify with their asian father. Also usually when it’s AMWF the Asian guy is cool whereas with WMAF the white guy is often a socially awkward loser.
I can’t repeat enough how little I think of white men’s abilities to raise minority children but if you love him and he is willing to learn then teach him. If he’s a fuckwit like nexdemise who complains about anti-white racism and SJWs then you need to drop him instantly. If he’s a fuckwit who claims to be “colorblind” and appears otherwise liberal then he is teachable but is still a fuckwit until taught correctly.
That being said I legitimately wish you happiness.
The rest of them have mental problems. Depression, suicide, crime, drug abuse, mental breakdown, inferiority feelings. It’s a tragedy.
And all likelihood is it won’t change. White males would have to give up the power. Ain’t gonna happen. We’re screwed. Just bi-products of Asian inferiority and white supremacy. Like we are some sort of trophy that our father conquered the Asians.
It’s not gonna get better so we just have to focus on making it less worse.
because you’re more likely to be dating a racist, a supremacist like Nexdemise. someone who disdains asian men or has no regard for them but will date asian women exclusively. I can already point that out in this thread.
Good to know. Thanks. Seriously though, ad hominems all around. I might as well go “2 inch chink chode”.
I bet you thought he was a nice white guy with an asian gf. This is what you don’t see from your white men. the side that wants to snuff out any link to your race that you or your kids have left. they are not at all interested in raising proud asians. actually you two can go on perfectly fine and have girls but an asian son would be subject to his father’s and asian women’s belittling of asian men. listen to this podcast at 6:30. shit like this is normal in white society.
More aggregated comments:
Lol at all these careerist women who run off with a foreign man to a foreign country and only think about money, then in their 30s and 40s start caring about their “roots” and “Chinese culture”. Of course the kids are negatively affected, as the mother will force them into language classes and “cultural events”, only to resent them for not being real Chinese.
On a post about blogger Xiaxue feminizing her half Asian son:
This post resonates with me. My mother used to dress me up in dresses like a girl when I was that age. She used to always feminize the shit out of me growing up as a kid too.
She made me moisturize my hands till they looked like girls hands, condition my hair everyday. Talk to people from a feminine asian position of submission and over extreme politeness. To be ultra clean like a girl would be – rejecting any male like traits like they were bad for me. I could go on and on.
In short, we Hapa men, are Asian men born from Asian women who thought Asian men were inferior or unattractive or unmarriageable in every way; and our fathers were racist (or clueless) enough to support this by virtue of their desire for sex and partnership.
We Hapas / Eurasians / Half-Asian people are almost overwhelming born from white fathers, implying that Asian features, when on a male, indicate undesirability, not only romantically, but by society itself.
The myth of “Hapa / half-Asian beauty” is just a myth, and if we are not beautiful, or just look Asian, we are just reminded that Asian men are at the bottom of the hierarchy socially, romantically, as evidenced by even our own mothers’ choices. The entire value of Hapas then, becomes his looks or his ability to not look Asian, and if he fails to meet this criteria he will be poorly equipped to deal with it.
Claims of cultural flaws of Asian men also conveniently coincide with Asian men being rated the least desirable. Moreover, my father as with many other Hapas’ fathers was an extreme cultural conservative and vitriolic anti-feminist.
Don’t believe me, ask for proof and I’ll provide; I literally am taking a monumental risk writing this blog as the details are fairly specific. There is nothing on this website that can be refuted logically.
My father was borderline-autistic, unable to make eye contact, and saw Asian women as a “replacement white woman” when he was unable to get a white woman; my mother saw his blue eyes and height and saw him as a ticket to integration and higher status in her new life in the west.
It simply does not make sense for an Asian woman who, like millions of others, views Asian men as worthless, then has a half Asian son, and expect him to accept this, rationally. There is no political thesis or alignment that can explain the massive imbalance other than one that is self evident to no one but the children of these relationships and this blog looks to understand and expose them.
Asian women and their insistence on marrying and having children with white men is not something based on love, but rather (at worst) on hate (largely of Asian men) or at best un-attraction,yet their sons are Asian men and we are taught from birth that love is not colorblind (I’ll discuss how loveless and hateful my parents’ marriage was, later in this essay).
I have come across enough Asian women who thought I was beneath them, to believe that all of us, their sons, must resent and hate our parents in order to truly punish them. Contrarily, embracing this and finding solace in hedonism with white women would effectively mean that I have to admit that I am able to do so because I am half-White; and this is not a moral or healthy choice. I would rather embrace my Asianness and expose these issues – as very few other Hapas are willing to. I no longer want to sit by and watch the hypocrisy and hatred flying through the Asian community and the effect this has on people much more susceptible than me (as you can see how susceptible I was two years ago).
For reference, I am in my 20’s, look similar to a whiter version of Hong Kong celebrity Daniel Wu (the kind of Hapa that looks white to some; Asian to others; yet photographs more Asian; porcelain white skin that sunburns, very dark brown, thick and difficult to maintain hair, brown-greenish eyes, hairless chest and arms but hairy legs), am Ivy League educated and from a considerably wealthy Chinese American family on the East Coast (the wealth is not mine, directly). I also have one mentally ill brother, in his 30’s, unemployed, institutionalized and a virgin, who looks significantly more Asian than me. My father was, when younger, 6’3″, blue eyed, red haired and with a large beard, my mother 5’3″ or 5’4″, slender, with dyed red hair, colored contacts, and a sexless and unhappy marriage as long as I can remember.
We are lauded up as some kind of beautiful Hapa miracle children, but in reality we are born out of nothing other than cultural fetishization and the pursuit of certain physical attributes, neither of which we are capable of having, since we are, after all, Asian men.
Only after we are born do our parents begin to panic and start trying to instill self-esteem in us by teaching us about our heritage, falsely encouraging us to believe that we will be accepted by whites, or worse, by Asians, the same Asians that our mothers were trying to escape from. The irony of teaching Hapas to be proud to be Asian when Asian women are willfully throwing themselves at white men, is staggering.
But it’s obvious by just going outside, where you can see White male / Asian woman couples sitting next to other white male / Asian woman couples they don’t even know – that love is not colorblind, and as a Eurasian male this became evident to me in my teens, despite the fact that I do not look that Asian.
In fact, Hapas and Eurasians are still treated as Asians by discerning whites (anyone who bothers to make the distinction will not make the distinction between full, and half) turned down not only by white women but by also Asian women, subject to jokes and insults by the white majority where he is, and then outcast by full Asians who view him as an oddity.
Hapas and Eurasians are supposed to merely accept that white men were the ideal in their mothers’ eyes, and that no matter what we will never be the full white person, or allowed entry into white culture, the same one that our mothers had such an easy time integrating with.
The only reason that talking about this is taboo is because of our culture in which such sensitive subjects of race and gender are immediately shut down in favor of a sugar-coated anti-reality that seeks to ignore that the vast, vast, vast majority of Eurasians have white fathers. So we literally see hundreds of thousands of Eurasians with white last names parading around like they are unique, when really we represent the obvious failings of Asian men to procreate.